Australia, and my thoughts on it.

So I haven't been missing Australia as much as I expected myself to at this point, one month into my travels. Sure, I miss the some of the home comforts from time to time... or should I say place to place? Generally though, I've been feeling pretty okay about being away from the only place I've been for 21 years. Which is why I was quite surprised by an experience I had on the Greyhound between Mobile and Orlando.

No, I'm not referring to my experiences with the rednecks in Alabama. Nor am I speaking of the crazed, drugged up Floridian felon that sat next to me for several frightening hours. Rather, I'm talking about a hallucination of sorts that I had late that night. I was so tired that I didn't know if I was still in Exhaustion County, or whether I'd crossed the border into Delirium State. In this near-sleep state, I looked up at the moon and was surprised to see John Howard's face was there, looking down at me.

Now, I should be clear here. The craters of the moon didn't look like regular John Howard. They in fact looked just like his caricature: the image I've seen time and time again in the political cartoons in the West Australian. The likeness was uncanny, and as Johnny Eyebrows looked down his glasses at me, I wondered not for the first time on this trip whether I was losing my mind.

I shook my head and rubbed my eyes to see if it would fade away, as some hallucinations do. It didn't. For the rest of that night, each time I looked out the window, little Johnny was there looking down on me.

I wondered what this meant.

Anyway, at some point over the following 48 hours, the idea fermented in my mind that I needed to go to the movies and watch Baz Luhrmann's Australia to see if I was secretly pining for the homeland. To see if it would affect me at all.

So I saw it. To be honest, it didn't offend me. I know. I'm as surprised as you to hear that. I was bracing myself for it since it came out. I really thought it was going to make my cringe factor break Mach 3. So now I'm not sure what to think. I came out of it neither hating nor loving Australia, which I guess sums up also how I feel about the homeland now that I'm not in it. This is a step up I think, because I really didn't like the place very much when I left.

I also tried to gauge the reactions of the Americans that were watching it with me. This was hard to do. I was the first person in the cinema, and wasn't expecting any more, but in the end it was almost full. It's hard for me to make an assessment. Most of the people were speaking about it in Spanish when we exited. A lot of the women were teary and emotional. Most of the guys didn't seem to give a damn. The she-male looked decidedly undecided in her/his opinion, which I found fitting.

One thing I do know though, was at the end, when the screen said something about Australia abandoning the assimilation policy in the 1970s, a surprised noise filtered through the audience. And when the final words on the screen said that the Australian Government apologised for this in 2008, about 90% of the audience gasped.

Make what you will of that.

Oh, and also, everyone cheered when the Aboriginal elder speared David Wenham good. He makes such a good bad guy....

Should I stay or should I go?

I'm meant to be leaving New Orleans in 2 days for Miami: where the weather is warm, the guns are numerous, and the coke is as available as cola. As cool as that all sounds, I don't really want to leave the Bourbon House. It's too good here. All the other hostels I've stayed at have been cold and alienating, or had some sort of fatal flaw, but this place is amazing. The people here are the best.

Last night I stayed up playing Trivial Pursuit: The 90s Edition with Damon (from Florida) and Rachael (from Belfast). We were all pretty hopeless, so we ended up staying up til about 3am just talking. It was great. Today the bunch of us plus Rachael's brother Aaron, and James (New Yorker) went out to lunch on Decatur St at some place that had 1 dollar daiquiris.

This place is everything I hoped a hostel could be. I've never felt so comfortable and at ease with a bunch of strangers before. There aren't any uncomfortable silences. Even dodgy things that go on here are just a laugh to everyone.

The owner Reese, or Randolph as he is sometimes known, has a bunch of stories to tell. A series of unfortunate events kept occurring last week as he was checking in new guests. One night a car exploded down the road just as he was talking up the safety of the area. Two nights later, in a similar situation, a factory houses down was set alight in an insurance fraud scam. There were also more stories about a bus crash, and teenagers shooting at the building with BB guns. It sounds scary on paper, but all these things were such a hoot to hear about. And there wasn't much real danger for any of these situations.

I'm going to miss this place. I'm pretty much decided that I have to move on, but I really don't want to. If I stay I'll run out of things to do and get bored. I'm already a bit antsy. But I won't soon forget the fun I've had here and the awesome people I've met. I think I have most of them on facebook now, which is good.

I should be optimistic. Each city I've visited so far has been better than the last. Maybe the next place will be even better...

*EDIT*

It's been pissing with rain, and the dodgy shade cover thing out the back collapsed under the weight of the rain that had accumulated on it. All the metal pylons are warped and snapped. A bunch of us went out there and salvaged the furniture and outdoor lighting, laughing as ice cold buckets of rain hit us at random intervals. Not to mention the hidden buildups on the non-collapsed parts that we inadvertently dumped on ourselves. This place is fantastic.

Let's do the time warp again.

Today the weather has been miserable. Light rain, high humidity. My hair is all messed up and after venturing out a few times I'm sweaty and smelly. So I've spent a lot of today on the couch, reading, working on the Sudoku book Paige gave me (that thing is driving me nuts) and trying and failing to write anything decent for my current story (I've never had so many ideas in my life! But more planning is necessary.)

In my comings and goings from the Bourbon House, the same few people have been sitting around doing whatever they do in the common room. The tv has been on all day on this one channel that seems to repeat the same episodes of CSI over and over and over again. I saw them all at least twice throughout the course of the day. And even though I'm ensconced in my book or whatever, I feel the repetitiveness of it driving a little teensy tiny wedge of insanity into my brain.

I was getting irritated. Antsy. I wanted to change the channel but for some reason I didn't. But what was really getting to me was that the other people in the room, who had been there as long, if not longer than I, didn't seem to notice at all that they were watching the same 3 episodes again and again. They reacted as normal people do when watching something for the first time.

Is everyone that inattentive? Or have I simply lost my marbles?

Maybe I need more sleep. My current lifestyle involves staying up all night talking about what's wrong with the world with a New Yorker and an Irishman, getting up before 11 to get my free pancakes, and going back to bed until I can be bothered moving.

Free breakfast is the greatest luxury of the modern world.

The perfect blog title, too late.

Australien.

AustrAlien.

The perfect title for a travel blog from an Aussie abroad. But the url is already taken.

Damn.

The Need For Fresh Food: Or How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Walmart.

Today I finally managed to find a Walmart within walking distance. This feat has taken me over 3 weeks to achieve, and has made me so happy I'm a little scared. Being in the centre of world capitalism, I would have thought it would be easy to find anything I need at any time, but it hasn't been like that at all. Sure there are plenty of stores. Lots of little corner shops, convenience stores, and Walgreen's (each more identical than the last). But in all of these places, the ratio of real food to candy is like 3:1 in favour of candy.

So you go about your business being a tourist. You're hungry, you look down the street. You see McDonalds, Starbucks, Subway, Popeye's everywhere. You begrudgingly have to settle for these things more often than you'd like to, unless you want to break the bank. You crave fresh fruit. Broccoli. Salad that isn't incarcerated within a greasy burger prison.

It's funny how my mind works. In the back of my mind I've been worrying quite a bit about eating right (which I haven't been accomplishing well since LA). But it doesn't manifest itself in the way I would think. I don't worry about feeling sick, weight gain, weight loss, or any long term health problems. No sir. I walk down the street and I think to myself:

I am going to die because I haven't eaten an apple.

If I don't find a salad, I will die.

But it's all alright now. Today I found Walmart. It may be costing me an arm and a leg to eat right in this country but it sure is worth it.

Union Station Blues

So yesterday I spent the better part of a freezing Chicago day waiting for my train to New Orleans at Union Station. As I sat around I noticed several groups of Amish folks milling around. There was a couple with a young baby girl. The parents looked about 15. It was kind of scary to think about.

So I'm watching these strange people with their beards and their funny hats and I'm reflecting on the oddness of seeing a people who churn their own butter standing in a concourse with LCD screens and motorized machinery, when I notice one of them is carrying a thermos. A thermos?! Are they allowed to have a thermos? Or do the rules change when they're outside their normal commune?

This was disturbing me. I went for a walk, came back and went into McDonalds. The Amish were there. In McDonalds. Eating their Happy Meals and their McCafe coffees.

I'm thinking: 'this is insane.' I think about going over there and striking up a conversation, but then a group of black guys sit at the table next to them. These guys are wearing some bling and have cool hoodies. The Amish, as one, turn and angle their bodies away from these newcomers. After a few awkward moments they rise and move steadily away.

This is the only moment of my Amish experience that makes sense.

Unfortunately.

Strange feelings I am having

Life has been strange since uni ended. I feel like I'm in stasis. Neither here nor there. Time is passing, but nothing is really happening. Everyone else dances around me while I'm fixed to the floor in the centre of the room. It's comfortable, and fun most of the time, but nothing is really going anywhere. I'm just waiting to go on my travels. But in the lead up to my exodus from Perth I feel even stranger.

I'm filled with this strange nostalgia. I have all these loving feelings for the people around me. I guess these are the sorts of feelings one normally gets in there last few days of uni or school when they are about to end a chapter and start a new one, but I've never felt them before. I couldn't wait to leave the crazed zealotry of my high school, and I cruised through uni with about as much emotional investment as you find in a basic Jean-Claude Van Damme movie.

So it's all new to me. I go to work and I feel like giving Jen a big hug. I feel like kissing Maria on the forehead. I feel like staying up all night talking to Kayleen. I have strange and symbolic dreams about James and Todd. I want to fondle Ben gently under the starlight. I'm going to miss that place.

Haha, I must be crazy.

But I will miss it. There were a lot of dreadful times and pathetic fights, and bickering, and all kinds of injustices, but in the end I can't help but feel that there aren't too many jobs I'll get in the future that will have me working alongside such cool young people, and hilarious old crazies. I'm pretty grateful to have worked at IGA and to have lasted so long. It's weird to think of the friends and workmates who have fallen on the wayside and been fired or asked to move on. I'm glad I can leave on my own terms.